Brilio.net - Parents may often forget and not realize that their role is very important in the growth and development of children. Sometimes, in daily practice, there are still parents who limit or restrain their children excessively. This unconsciously limits the child's space and freedom to explore and learn from experience. In fact, this matter can have an impact on the child's behavior and psychology in the long term.
In parenting science, communication with children is crucial for parents. There needs to be open communication, including communication about what the child wants. Parents must listen and open a discussion space for children so that the term restraint does not arise.
"Communication (parents and children) must be two-way. So there must be listening to what the child wants to be like? If there is something that is not quite right, then direct it," said Clinical Psychologist Choirunisa Nirahma when contacted by brilio.net via Zoom, Wednesday (25/9).
Therefore, it is important to implement a balanced parenting pattern , where children have measured freedom and still receive proper direction. Balanced parenting will help children grow into independent, confident individuals who are able to face various life challenges well.
In general, the psychological impacts of parents being too restrictive with their children include:
photo: freepik.com
1. Lack of independence
When children are too restricted in their decision-making or prevented from trying new things, they tend to grow up with a high sense of dependency. The lack of opportunities to learn from mistakes makes it difficult for children to develop independence, even into adulthood.
2. Low self-confidence
Overly restrictive parents often make children feel incapable or afraid to take risks. As a result, children become doubtful of their own abilities and feel less confident in facing life's challenges.
3. The emergence of rebellious behavior
Overly strict limits and excessive rules can trigger resistance from children. Frustration due to lack of freedom can drive children to rebel, either in the form of behavior that defies rules, hides feelings, or even does unwanted actions.
4. Social and emotional problems
The impact of parents being too restrictive on their children is also seen in their social relationships. Children who feel pressured usually have difficulty socializing and building healthy relationships with peers. They are also more susceptible to emotional problems such as anxiety and depression.
5. Loss of motivation
Children who are always directed without being given space to choose will lose initiative and motivation to do something. They can grow into individuals who only follow orders without having a strong desire to try or achieve something independently.
Balanced Parenting Tips.
photo: freepik.com
To avoid these negative impacts, parents need to apply a balanced parenting pattern between giving direction and letting children explore. Here are some tips for maintaining balance in parenting:
1. Give measurable freedom
Giving your child space to explore doesn't mean leaving them without limits. Set clear rules, but give your child the opportunity to make choices about simple things that are age appropriate, such as choosing clothes, food, or activities they want to do.
2. Encourage children to make decisions
Involve your child in decision-making. This helps them learn to understand the consequences of their own choices, and teaches them independence and responsibility from an early age.
3. Keep communication open
Children need to hear the reasons behind the rules they make. Explain in easy-to-understand language why something should be done or avoided. This will help children feel valued and more likely to accept the rules without feeling constrained.
4. Value the effort, not the result
Instead of focusing on the results achieved, give appreciation for the efforts made. This helps children develop self-confidence and not be afraid to try new things without fear of failure.
5. Teach responsibility gradually
Train children to take responsibility according to their age. Give them small tasks that they can complete on their own. That way, children will learn to be responsible and develop independence gradually.
6. Set flexible rules
Rules are important for maintaining discipline, but make sure they are flexible and adaptable to the situation. Parents need to be sensitive to their children's needs and feelings, so that the rules they apply do not feel restrictive or burdensome.